HOLES

Throughout life, it seems that we are always encountering holes; some of which we created ourselves and others made by nature. In any case, we attempt to fill the holes almost as soon as we find them. As youngsters, we would dig a hole in the dirt and then proceed to fill it with anything we could find. It seemed to be second nature to fill holes; sometimes it did not matter what we used to fill the empty space, it just had to be filled. The holes in the road created by harsh winters or heavy trucks would create a demand of our politicians to fill the holes …quickly. In our jobs or vocations, when we lacked important knowledge or skills required by our professions, it was necessary for us to obtain the education to fill the holes in our knowledge base. In general, holes just had to filled; it is part of our nature to fill holes. (It seems that the only hole that did not demand that it be filled is that of a donut hole.)

In the human person, there are holes in one’s character or makeup that also need to be filled or adjusted. Throughout life, we are constantly attempting to fill our lives with things in the hope of satisfying some hole or other, whether it is material or spiritual. We find that material things seldom, if ever, really satisfy our personal holes of dissatisfaction. In our personal lives, there is one hole that is so total and huge that it is not capable of being filled in this life. This hole is the loss of one loved intensely over a long time.

Losing a spouse or close family member to death creates a hole – a feeling of loss and emptiness –  that may never be filled in. That unique person who was your spouse and who joined with you to create and raise your children, while sharing all the aspects of your life in love, is not replaceable. Another person may enter your life and provide some relief from the loss and emptiness of life created by the loss of one’s partner, but the hole will never be completely filled. This hole is not eliminated as is a patch on road or a new job skill. The hole created by the death of a loved spouse is permanent, which will only truly be filled in heaven when the two are reunited .